Brutally free resume reviews

Your resume called.
It needs a roast.

Paste your resume. Get a sharp, funny, actually useful verdict in seconds. No signup. No corporate hand-holding. Just the truth and a way out.

Free forever roast · No account · Private by default

0

Signup forms required

3

sections in your roast

$9

tailored rewrite coming soon

01 / Input the evidence

Drop the resume. Brace yourself.

Optional PDF

Upload a text-based PDF or paste your resume above.

No account. No payment. No fake compliments.

02 / The verdict

Your career reality check lands here.

No resume. No roast.

Paste your text, hit the button, and we’ll turn vague ambition into actionable damage control.

Brutal · Funny · Useful

The process

Less therapy. More trajectory.

01

Paste it

Drop in your resume text. PDF selection is there when you need it.

02

Get roasted

We flag weak proof, dead buzzwords, and bullet points that say almost nothing.

03

Fix the damage

Take the fast fixes—or watch for the $9 tailored rewrite when it drops.

The next move

Roast is free.
The glow-up is $9.

When tailored rewrites launch, we’ll turn the exact weak spots in your resume into tighter, evidence-first copy you can edit and own.

Tailored Rewrite — Coming Soon

  • Sharper experience bullets
  • A clearer career story
  • Editable, job-ready language
Get your free roast first

Your move

Stop wondering why it’s quiet.
Get the receipts.

Roast my resume